1 00:00:06,090 --> 00:00:07,690 Is somebody going to turn on the TV? 2 00:00:11,610 --> 00:00:13,050 Is that a battery? 3 00:00:13,590 --> 00:00:14,590 Let me try. 4 00:00:19,450 --> 00:00:20,870 What the hell is that smell? 5 00:00:26,330 --> 00:00:29,070 No, I know my smell and that's not it. 6 00:00:31,270 --> 00:00:32,269 Coming from the kitchen. 7 00:00:38,670 --> 00:00:39,670 What's all this? 8 00:00:39,890 --> 00:00:41,590 I'm working on a really important project. 9 00:00:42,790 --> 00:00:44,130 He's making jewelry. 10 00:00:46,230 --> 00:00:48,990 It's not jewelry. It's a Lucite keepsake for Angela. 11 00:00:49,850 --> 00:00:51,150 Friday's our three -month anniversary. 12 00:00:52,010 --> 00:00:53,130 Wow, three months. 13 00:00:53,450 --> 00:00:54,730 Hasn't it gotten boring yet? 14 00:00:55,110 --> 00:00:56,110 Not at all. 15 00:00:56,130 --> 00:00:57,130 I mean, for her. 16 00:00:59,170 --> 00:01:00,390 What are you putting in Lucite? 17 00:01:00,610 --> 00:01:04,870 I saved a piece of popcorn from our first date. 18 00:01:06,380 --> 00:01:08,460 I thought it would be romantic if I turned it into a paperweight. 19 00:01:14,180 --> 00:01:16,300 Hey, Nick. 20 00:01:18,200 --> 00:01:19,200 Bad news. 21 00:01:19,420 --> 00:01:20,420 Uncle Ted died. 22 00:01:21,920 --> 00:01:22,920 We had an Uncle Ted? 23 00:01:23,980 --> 00:01:26,620 Oh, yeah. Yeah, and he left each of us 900 bucks. 24 00:01:28,480 --> 00:01:29,480 Uncle Ted. 25 00:01:31,600 --> 00:01:33,080 I'd say we spent it on something fun. 26 00:01:33,700 --> 00:01:35,220 Absolutely. I'm getting a new dryer. 27 00:01:35,680 --> 00:01:37,840 What? A new dryer. 28 00:01:38,620 --> 00:01:40,380 Why don't we just give the money to charity? 29 00:01:42,560 --> 00:01:46,500 Kyle's right, Nick. Come on, we can't just crap all over dear old Uncle Ted's 30 00:01:46,500 --> 00:01:47,500 memory. 31 00:01:47,800 --> 00:01:51,300 I say we pool our money. We get a hot tub. Keep it here in the backyard. 32 00:01:52,560 --> 00:01:55,380 We don't need a hot tub. 33 00:01:55,640 --> 00:01:57,460 Sure we do. We don't have one. 34 00:01:57,720 --> 00:01:58,740 And I have looked. 35 00:02:00,220 --> 00:02:03,100 You're always complaining about your back, Dad. Those things are supposed to 36 00:02:03,100 --> 00:02:04,100 very therapeutic. 37 00:02:04,300 --> 00:02:05,300 Mm -hmm. Oh! 38 00:02:05,310 --> 00:02:07,250 Come on, Nick. Hey, look at these smiles, huh? 39 00:02:08,470 --> 00:02:10,590 There. I want to be as happy as that girl. 40 00:02:11,290 --> 00:02:16,310 Look at him, Dad. He's got two babes and a really cool mustache. 41 00:02:22,230 --> 00:02:23,470 He does look happy. 42 00:02:23,710 --> 00:02:24,710 Yeah! 43 00:02:25,010 --> 00:02:29,830 But... If we get a hot tub, it's for me and Jimmy. 44 00:02:30,490 --> 00:02:33,570 You kids can use it if and when I say you can. 45 00:02:34,010 --> 00:02:36,040 Fine. If and when. 46 00:02:37,040 --> 00:02:38,040 Everybody say it. 47 00:02:38,540 --> 00:02:39,920 If and when. 48 00:02:41,820 --> 00:02:44,120 All right, Jimmy, let's put our money together. 49 00:02:44,500 --> 00:02:45,780 Hey, there's nothing in here. 50 00:02:46,020 --> 00:02:49,340 What? Well, that's how sure I was you liked the idea. It'll be delivered 51 00:02:49,340 --> 00:02:50,340 Saturday. 52 00:03:18,160 --> 00:03:21,280 Check it out. I put a cockroach in Lucide and made earrings. 53 00:03:23,420 --> 00:03:25,760 Will you stop putting bugs in there? 54 00:03:26,060 --> 00:03:28,800 Do you see the little girls on this box putting bugs in theirs? 55 00:03:31,080 --> 00:03:32,960 Stupid Lucide is so sticky. 56 00:03:35,420 --> 00:03:37,860 You pulled skin off. 57 00:03:39,180 --> 00:03:41,780 Cool. Now I can use your fingerprints to commit crimes. 58 00:03:45,580 --> 00:03:48,200 Oh, man, are you still making that stupid popcorn thing? 59 00:03:49,420 --> 00:03:51,600 What are you going through all that trouble for anyway, Sam? 60 00:03:52,100 --> 00:03:53,100 Angela's going to hate it. 61 00:03:53,340 --> 00:03:56,000 No, she won't. She's very sentimental about things like that. 62 00:03:56,240 --> 00:03:59,220 Trust me, when it comes to gifts, girls like things big and expensive. 63 00:03:59,680 --> 00:04:00,760 She'll like it, you'll see. 64 00:04:01,220 --> 00:04:03,300 Oh, she'll pretend to like it. 65 00:04:03,800 --> 00:04:07,040 She'll be all, thank you, I love it. 66 00:04:08,620 --> 00:04:12,140 But on the inside, she's going to be saying, I put up with all this clumsy 67 00:04:12,140 --> 00:04:13,220 funneling for this? 68 00:04:17,420 --> 00:04:21,019 No, she won't. And my fondling skills have greatly improved. 69 00:04:26,480 --> 00:04:27,480 Savage residence. 70 00:04:28,020 --> 00:04:29,020 Angela, hi. 71 00:04:29,040 --> 00:04:31,220 Hey. Happy anniversary. 72 00:04:34,740 --> 00:04:35,740 What's that? 73 00:04:35,780 --> 00:04:36,840 It's your present, silly. 74 00:04:37,560 --> 00:04:40,940 Please tell me that you comically put one box inside of another inside of 75 00:04:40,940 --> 00:04:41,940 another. No. 76 00:04:49,500 --> 00:04:52,220 Wow. It's heavy. Yeah. 77 00:04:52,460 --> 00:04:54,780 What a great gift this must be. 78 00:04:55,580 --> 00:04:57,360 Definitely not a cheap trinket. 79 00:05:01,080 --> 00:05:04,140 You need a hand with yours, Sam? Oh, I can't wait to see it. 80 00:05:04,580 --> 00:05:05,760 Uh, mine? 81 00:05:06,020 --> 00:05:11,220 Mine is, uh... Well, uh... Oh, my God, Sam! 82 00:05:11,460 --> 00:05:15,260 I was supposed to pick it up from the plate, but I forgot. 83 00:05:15,900 --> 00:05:16,900 Huh? 84 00:05:19,880 --> 00:05:20,779 You forgot? 85 00:05:20,780 --> 00:05:22,180 Yeah, I know, I know. I'm sorry. 86 00:05:22,620 --> 00:05:23,620 How could you forget? 87 00:05:24,160 --> 00:05:27,520 You are seriously the biggest moron on the face of this planet. 88 00:05:29,500 --> 00:05:31,020 I said I was sorry. 89 00:05:31,980 --> 00:05:35,860 Well, sorry doesn't put a smile on my girlfriend's face, does it? 90 00:05:38,120 --> 00:05:39,120 No. 91 00:05:40,320 --> 00:05:43,740 No. I'm too stupid. I forgot to pick it up. 92 00:05:46,200 --> 00:05:48,420 Well, if it was so important... 93 00:05:49,159 --> 00:05:51,400 Maybe you should have picked it up. Right, Angela? 94 00:05:53,180 --> 00:05:54,980 All right, all right. Apology accepted. 95 00:05:57,260 --> 00:05:58,660 Maybe we could exchange gifts later? 96 00:05:59,120 --> 00:06:02,020 Well, um, I have to go out with my parents, but I can come over when we get 97 00:06:02,020 --> 00:06:05,500 back. Excellent. And once again, sorry my brother's such an idiot. 98 00:06:10,580 --> 00:06:11,740 Thanks. You're welcome. 99 00:06:18,659 --> 00:06:20,540 Maybe it's a gigantic piece of popcorn. 100 00:06:27,960 --> 00:06:29,400 Or a jewelry -making kit. 101 00:06:29,680 --> 00:06:30,720 You love those. 102 00:06:31,880 --> 00:06:35,420 I can't give her a piece of popcorn. She'll dump me for anyone. 103 00:06:37,600 --> 00:06:39,520 I'd better hit the mall and get her a real gift. 104 00:06:39,960 --> 00:06:40,960 Oh, hey, you want a ride? 105 00:06:41,140 --> 00:06:43,320 Yeah, that would be great. Yeah, wouldn't it? Take a bus. 106 00:06:49,930 --> 00:06:50,930 Savages. That's us. 107 00:06:51,330 --> 00:06:53,050 Hey, Shaquille O 'Neal. No relation. 108 00:06:55,530 --> 00:06:57,070 Got the hot tub in my truck. 109 00:06:57,590 --> 00:06:59,510 Really? Our dad wasn't expecting you until tomorrow. 110 00:06:59,810 --> 00:07:03,510 See, I'm expecting a lady friend here from Baltimore tomorrow, so I might have 111 00:07:03,510 --> 00:07:05,990 to call in sick if you catch my drift. 112 00:07:07,530 --> 00:07:09,070 Oh, we do, yeah. 113 00:07:09,290 --> 00:07:12,290 All right, you guys. Well, come on up here and help me get this tub off the 114 00:07:12,290 --> 00:07:13,009 of my truck. 115 00:07:13,010 --> 00:07:14,210 We have to help? 116 00:07:14,750 --> 00:07:16,090 Yeah, you're the delivery guy? 117 00:07:16,610 --> 00:07:18,390 Yeah, but I don't want to hurt my back. 118 00:07:18,600 --> 00:07:20,520 I told you my lady friend is coming in tomorrow. 119 00:07:23,980 --> 00:07:29,560 Gentlemen, I give you the Supremo. 120 00:07:32,360 --> 00:07:36,380 Yes, just like the Magnifico, only 20 % more expensive. 121 00:07:37,900 --> 00:07:38,900 And better. 122 00:07:40,020 --> 00:07:44,380 Get a couple of waitresses up in there. Woo, and let the magic begin. 123 00:07:49,100 --> 00:07:50,100 I'm a child. 124 00:07:51,700 --> 00:07:53,760 Not once you get them waitresses up in there. 125 00:07:59,740 --> 00:08:03,240 All right. All you guys have to do is watch this safety video and she's all 126 00:08:03,240 --> 00:08:05,040 yours. Safety video? 127 00:08:07,300 --> 00:08:11,940 The Massachusetts Safety Board, in conjunction with the President's Council 128 00:08:11,940 --> 00:08:16,400 Hot Tubs, with a generous grant from Swingers Anonymous, 129 00:08:19,300 --> 00:08:22,300 presents Hot Tub Hell Tub. 130 00:08:28,680 --> 00:08:34,220 Did you know the average hot tub has five gallons of human urine floating in 131 00:08:37,520 --> 00:08:38,520 Got your attention? 132 00:08:40,400 --> 00:08:42,440 Hi, I'm Officer Steve Cox. 133 00:08:43,440 --> 00:08:47,300 Hot tubbing can be fun, but it can also be... 134 00:08:49,160 --> 00:08:50,160 Not fun. 135 00:08:55,480 --> 00:08:58,240 There are six ways you can die in a hot tub. 136 00:08:59,060 --> 00:09:01,520 For the sake of brevity, I'll skip the first three. 137 00:09:04,540 --> 00:09:05,540 Say, Misty. 138 00:09:07,840 --> 00:09:12,200 Don't you think a strawberry daiquiri would taste just great right about now? 139 00:09:13,540 --> 00:09:14,540 Wrong. 140 00:09:15,820 --> 00:09:18,020 Never drink alcohol while tubbing. 141 00:09:18,990 --> 00:09:23,970 Or you could end up drinking a strawberry... ...ethery. 142 00:09:28,490 --> 00:09:30,650 Now, I like suction as much as the next guy. 143 00:09:31,830 --> 00:09:35,290 But I wouldn't like my entrails ripped out through my tailpipe. 144 00:09:37,730 --> 00:09:42,490 Now, 5 ,000 volts is great for snuffing out scum on death row. 145 00:09:43,690 --> 00:09:48,250 But it can also kill a romantic evening with your special lady. 146 00:09:50,670 --> 00:09:54,850 So appliances like this little baby have got to go. 147 00:09:57,150 --> 00:09:57,750 Enjoy 148 00:09:57,750 --> 00:10:10,890 your 149 00:10:10,890 --> 00:10:14,230 new hot tub. And remember, all sales are... 150 00:10:26,510 --> 00:10:28,470 is one weird safety video. 151 00:10:30,330 --> 00:10:32,730 Yeah, why would they leave in the part where the girl got killed? 152 00:11:07,790 --> 00:11:08,950 We can be in Canada by midnight. 153 00:11:12,850 --> 00:11:15,050 Hey, guys, I'm back from the... You broke it already? 154 00:11:17,870 --> 00:11:21,670 Look, Sam, you'd be doing us a really big favor if you told Dad you're the one 155 00:11:21,670 --> 00:11:22,670 who broke it. 156 00:11:23,630 --> 00:11:26,190 Then he'd kill me. I said really big. 157 00:11:27,530 --> 00:11:29,070 Man, he's gonna go ballistic. 158 00:11:29,590 --> 00:11:31,050 Maybe we can glue it back together. 159 00:11:31,450 --> 00:11:32,450 Are you crazy? 160 00:11:32,730 --> 00:11:35,310 There isn't a glue on Earth that could hold that. 161 00:11:35,530 --> 00:11:37,230 What about the lewthite? That might work. 162 00:11:40,610 --> 00:11:42,570 PJ, the whole tub has to be refilled. 163 00:11:43,010 --> 00:11:44,330 Don't tell me how to slather. 164 00:11:46,230 --> 00:11:47,610 You really think this will work? 165 00:11:48,330 --> 00:11:49,690 I don't see how it can't. 166 00:11:56,050 --> 00:11:58,670 How are you going to clean the excess lucite out of Dad's good pot? 167 00:12:00,410 --> 00:12:01,410 Do what now? 168 00:12:03,750 --> 00:12:04,750 Never mind. 169 00:12:10,160 --> 00:12:12,400 message. You got a big surprise for me. Oh, yeah. 170 00:12:12,720 --> 00:12:16,880 Now, I don't want to oversell it, but this is the best present you will ever 171 00:12:16,880 --> 00:12:18,060 receive in your entire life. 172 00:12:18,700 --> 00:12:19,700 Wow. 173 00:12:25,580 --> 00:12:25,940 What 174 00:12:25,940 --> 00:12:34,780 is 175 00:12:34,780 --> 00:12:35,780 it? 176 00:12:36,900 --> 00:12:37,900 It's rugby. 177 00:12:40,200 --> 00:12:41,580 I don't know what that is, Sam. 178 00:12:42,260 --> 00:12:44,860 It's a fully automated robot vacuum. 179 00:12:48,840 --> 00:12:51,180 And no, I didn't bring it back from the future. 180 00:12:54,340 --> 00:12:55,620 You got me a vacuum? 181 00:12:55,960 --> 00:12:57,080 A robot vacuum. 182 00:12:58,440 --> 00:13:01,280 You know how you're always complaining that your mom's a neat freak and makes 183 00:13:01,280 --> 00:13:02,280 you clean your room all the time? 184 00:13:02,920 --> 00:13:08,820 I'm not always complaining. Sure you are. You're like a broken record. But 185 00:13:08,820 --> 00:13:09,820 here. 186 00:13:10,700 --> 00:13:14,000 We'll buzz around all over your room and keep it spotless. 187 00:13:17,440 --> 00:13:19,220 It takes the sting out of housework. 188 00:13:20,700 --> 00:13:22,900 Oh, thank you. I love it. 189 00:13:30,960 --> 00:13:31,960 You don't love it? 190 00:13:56,040 --> 00:13:57,040 You got me a tree? 191 00:13:58,840 --> 00:14:02,960 Remember our first date when we went to the movies and then you walked me home 192 00:14:02,960 --> 00:14:06,820 and we sat on that tree stump and you said you wished we could sit there 193 00:14:06,820 --> 00:14:07,820 forever? 194 00:14:08,240 --> 00:14:09,240 Well, now we can. 195 00:14:10,760 --> 00:14:11,760 Really? 196 00:14:12,120 --> 00:14:13,120 That's the stump? 197 00:14:14,240 --> 00:14:15,240 Our stump? 198 00:14:15,420 --> 00:14:17,520 I mean, I know it's kind of corny, but... No. 199 00:14:19,500 --> 00:14:20,500 It's perfect. 200 00:14:23,180 --> 00:14:25,400 Truth is, I got you something romantic, too. 201 00:14:25,740 --> 00:14:26,740 Oh, I know, the vacuum. 202 00:14:28,200 --> 00:14:29,600 No, no, better. 203 00:14:30,520 --> 00:14:32,180 I just didn't trust it. 204 00:14:36,400 --> 00:14:43,360 I made it myself. 205 00:14:47,360 --> 00:14:48,640 It's a cockroach. 206 00:14:50,480 --> 00:14:51,540 Stupid Kyle. 207 00:14:56,620 --> 00:14:57,620 Wait, here's mine. 208 00:14:58,680 --> 00:14:59,680 Okay. 209 00:15:04,940 --> 00:15:06,540 You saved this from our first date? 210 00:15:07,560 --> 00:15:10,160 I tried to pick out a really well -formed colonel. 211 00:15:13,060 --> 00:15:14,060 You're right, Sam. 212 00:15:14,740 --> 00:15:17,300 This is the best gift I've ever gotten in my entire life. 213 00:15:17,920 --> 00:15:19,040 Thank you. I love it. 214 00:15:42,980 --> 00:15:43,980 Hey, 215 00:15:48,620 --> 00:15:49,499 Nick. 216 00:15:49,500 --> 00:15:50,500 Toss me a beer. 217 00:15:50,720 --> 00:15:51,720 You got it. 218 00:16:19,950 --> 00:16:20,950 Why can't we move? 219 00:16:23,510 --> 00:16:24,830 Because you're getting old? 220 00:16:29,070 --> 00:16:30,070 Come here. 221 00:16:35,610 --> 00:16:38,210 Closer. To where I can bite you. 222 00:16:45,070 --> 00:16:47,870 Gotta say, Dad, you're taking this pretty well. 223 00:16:50,000 --> 00:16:52,720 That's only because I'm stuck in a casual pose. 224 00:16:55,840 --> 00:16:58,980 If I could move my arms, I would strangle you. 225 00:17:01,440 --> 00:17:04,460 Come on, come on. There's got to be something that'll dissolve this crap. 226 00:17:04,800 --> 00:17:06,680 Well, there's a whole bunch of chemicals under the sink. 227 00:17:07,960 --> 00:17:10,240 We could just pour them on you and see what happens. 228 00:17:12,420 --> 00:17:13,420 Let's not do that. 229 00:17:14,200 --> 00:17:16,740 Hey, doesn't nail polish remover get glue off? 230 00:17:17,000 --> 00:17:19,800 Oh, no. Lucite is a polymer ten times stronger than any glue. 231 00:17:22,599 --> 00:17:24,040 But you're thinking, and I like that. 232 00:17:29,480 --> 00:17:31,540 Maybe we should call the fire department. No! 233 00:17:33,300 --> 00:17:35,500 We work for those guys. We'll never hear the end of it. 234 00:17:35,740 --> 00:17:37,560 We could just take you to the emergency room. 235 00:17:38,340 --> 00:17:39,340 How? 236 00:17:40,360 --> 00:17:42,640 Load the hot tub in the back of the truck and drive us there? 237 00:17:46,800 --> 00:17:48,160 I don't think we have a choice, Nick. 238 00:17:49,560 --> 00:17:50,860 I have to go to the bathroom. 239 00:17:53,220 --> 00:17:56,320 All right, we'll go to the emergency room. But take the back roads. 240 00:17:56,980 --> 00:17:58,420 I don't want anybody seeing us. 241 00:18:00,940 --> 00:18:02,680 Dad, you know, we're really, really sorry. 242 00:18:03,280 --> 00:18:07,140 Yeah, we feel horrible about this, and we're going to get you out. 243 00:18:08,160 --> 00:18:09,160 I'm sure you will. 244 00:18:10,680 --> 00:18:14,660 I know I don't tell you boys often enough, but... 245 00:18:15,950 --> 00:18:16,950 I hate you. 246 00:18:29,930 --> 00:18:31,950 Okay, the tarp will make this less embarrassing. 247 00:18:32,490 --> 00:18:33,490 Thanks. 248 00:18:34,070 --> 00:18:35,070 For us. 249 00:18:59,980 --> 00:19:00,939 Take a left. 250 00:19:00,940 --> 00:19:02,360 It's not the way to the hospital. 251 00:19:03,260 --> 00:19:04,460 No, I want ice cream. 252 00:19:06,380 --> 00:19:07,380 Too bad. 253 00:19:09,220 --> 00:19:10,880 What the hell is this? 254 00:19:22,160 --> 00:19:23,160 My God. 255 00:19:28,080 --> 00:19:29,920 I don't need to be seen. Catch. Yeah. 256 00:19:34,380 --> 00:19:35,380 I'm done. 257 00:19:38,420 --> 00:19:39,420 What? 258 00:19:49,320 --> 00:19:50,320 Hey, Jimmy. 259 00:19:51,180 --> 00:19:52,180 Yeah? 260 00:19:53,040 --> 00:19:54,040 Thanks for the hot tub. 261 00:20:31,210 --> 00:20:32,210 just got the new dryer. 262 00:20:33,890 --> 00:20:36,330 What it's worth, we probably would have broken that, too. 263 00:20:37,510 --> 00:20:38,770 Did I say you could talk? 264 00:20:39,490 --> 00:20:42,050 You talk if and when I say so. 265 00:20:42,650 --> 00:20:43,730 When can you talk? 266 00:20:44,030 --> 00:20:45,310 If and when... Shut up! 267 00:20:49,670 --> 00:20:53,470 Can't you look on the bright side, Dad? I mean, those drag queens did get you 268 00:20:53,470 --> 00:20:54,470 out of the tub. 269 00:20:55,710 --> 00:20:58,250 Hey, I told you nail polish remover would work, huh? 270 00:21:00,300 --> 00:21:02,680 You know, we did win a prize for most fabulous family. 271 00:21:08,240 --> 00:21:09,240 And another thing. 272 00:21:09,580 --> 00:21:11,060 When I say something is mine.